Tommy Newberry's Secrets to a Joy Filled Life

Goals tell your brain what to…

Tommy — Fri, 22 Feb 2008 19:11:39 +0000

Goals tell your brain what to notice and pay attention to. You can discern a lot about your goals by reflecting upon the things you tend to notice most often. If you are noticing (and discussing) exciting opportunities, solutions, and possibilities for growth, contribution, advancement, and the achievement of worthwhile goals then your goals are in harmony with The 4:8 Principle. If you are giving attention to (and discussing) drudgery, irritation, faults, disappointment, and gridlock, then your goals are likely not in sync with 4:8. It is no mystery at all why goal setters “bump into” and “find” more success and satisfaction in life than those who simply wing it. This happens because they are actively looking for these things with the dynamic of faith on their side. Of course, most people want positive circumstances, but they spend more time thinking about (and talking about) what they are trying to avoid instead of dwelling upon and working toward what they intend to create. Over the next few days, practice praying, thinking, speaking, and behaving in alignment with what is lovely, pure, true, noble, excellent, and worthy of praise. Think 4:8 in 2008!

What do your most recent observations about life reveal about your quality of focus?

It is much simpler to practice The 4:8 Principle when…

Tommy — Mon, 18 Feb 2008 20:02:36 +0000

One of the most powerful ways to take charge of your mental life and jack up your potential for joy is by taking assertive control of your exposures. Your exposures refer to the sensory inputs that influence and trigger future thoughts and decisions. In particular you are highly influenced by the things you read, watch, and listen to and the people with whom you associate on a consistent basis. The average American pays little if any attention to their mental diet (or their physical diet) and pays for that neglect with both long and short term negative consequences. This is not for you. In light of your long term goals and values, what types of television programs should you be watching? In light of your long term goals, what should you be listening to during your drive time? In light of your long-term goals, who should you be investing most of your time with? It is much simpler to practice The 4:8 Principle when your exposures are in alignment with what is lovely, true, pure, gracious, excellent, and worthy of praise.

How are you doing in this area?

4:8 Your Mate for Valentine’s

Tommy — Thu, 14 Feb 2008 13:55:53 +0000

Build up and affirm each other daily! Once married, no one on the planet has such a dominating influence on your self-worth as your mate. In fact, in a marriage there is a collective self-image that establishes a ceiling of satisfaction for both of you. In other words, as he builds her up, he builds up the whole relationship. As she affirms him, she is affirming the future she really desires. This is important to keep in mind only during each of the 365 days every year. You can perpetually strengthen your marriage by purposefully becoming your spouse’s greatest champion.

Anyone can praise after the fact, but you can take a proactive role in the quality control of your relationship by affirming what is lovely, excellent, and appreciated…IN ADVANCE of its actual occurrence.

In what ways could you encourage your mate this Valentine’s Day with the words he/she wants and needs to hear?

Nowhere is this advice more valuable than in marriage…

Tommy — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 19:22:13 +0000

In Philippians 4:8 the Apostle Paul challenges us to fix our minds on what is excellent and worthy of praise! Nowhere is this advice more valuable than in marriage. Every thought you think about your spouse either moves you toward your best relationship or it moves you further away. Just thinking critically about your spouse, even if you believe it is warranted, will interrupt and postpone true intimacy and the closeness you both desire. As relentlessly as you may try, you cannot think one thing about your mate and experience something different in the relationship. And the more frequently you think about something, the tighter the grip it exerts on you, the decisions you make, and the actions you take. In what way might you be over-emphasizing a previous disappointment or struggle in your marriage?

Think 4:8 in 08…

Tommy — Fri, 01 Feb 2008 17:02:20 +0000

My office is now receiving emails, notes, and phone calls from readers of The 4:8 Principle across the country and even beyond our borders. Interestingly, most readers comment on the breakthrough they have had in a key relationship since reading The 4:8 Principle. It’s not surprising that emphasizing the positive qualities of the people you invest most of your time with will pay rich dividends. More than 90% of our inner dialogue tends to revolve around our dissatisfactions, worries, and fears. With this kind of turbulent mental life, it’s often difficult to see the good in the people we’re spending our life with. Remember, we internalize what we contemplate!
This is why The 4:8 Principle is so important. Who are the four people in your life who will benefit the most if you start putting The 4:8 Principle into practice on a daily basis?
For some additional 4:8 insights, check out Eric Bryant’s blog.